Dear Kristi,

Here's what's happening down here while you're up there.

Category: Uncategorized

Little Glimpses of Light — August 12, 2015

Little Glimpses of Light

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  1. Yesterday, I was doing laundry and realized that we were almost out of laundry soap. Then I actually started to wonder why laundry soap was so expensive. Then I started thinking about how money is a totally different thing to me now that we have a baby. It’s hard to not have enough money. It sucks.

Then my sister Holly showed up because she was driving through to Provo from Vegas. Her entire car was filled with groceries for us. Diapers, expensive healthy food I only dream about, and LAUNDRY SOAP. She is currently in the process moving her family of six to a new house and she stopped in the middle of her own chaos and thought of me. I will never forget how much that meant to me.

2. Tonight after putting the baby down to sleep, I went to my favorite hill in Cedar City and ran up and down that thing like a mad woman. The air was fresh and the sky was covered in clouds and colors. Being alone is good for me. Especially when I am drenched in sweat and outside. I am grateful Eric was home tonight so I could get out and be alone.

3. A friend posted a talk given by Elder Holland back in 1999, “Cast Not Away Therefore Your Confidence.” Read it. It might save you tonight if you feel a little defeated. It sure saved me.

4. Tonight after feeding Lewis, he was gazing at the light in his view. Usually, he does that, then gets distracted and chews on his hands or something. He didn’t do that tonight. He looked up at me in my eyes, smiled, and we both started laughing together. He would make a noise, then I would repeat it. Then we would both laugh. This lasted about five minutes. I think those five minutes were my favorite five minutes since becoming a mom.

In that moment, I felt pure joy. Joy that doesn’t come from buying a new shirt, or having awesome running shoes. This joy came straight from Heavenly Father. Lewis’s smile is a constant reminder to me that Heavenly Father loves me and is aware of my imperfections, fears, and worries. He is also aware that I am trying every day to be a little better.

These four moments are tender mercies to me during a difficult time. A time when I am trying to learn to be a good mom and a supportive and kind wife.. I have a bigger purpose than just cleaning up spit up, changing poopy diapers, and keeping up with the laundry (or not keeping up with the laundry). I need to be better at recognizing these glimpses of light and in turn, showing Heavenly Father my gratitude by serving Him through helping others.IMG_3873 IMG_3900

Here it goes… — December 7, 2014

Here it goes…

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Welcome to my first post on my new blog! I wanted to start blog once I became pregnant because I think this is a great way to keep a journal of my experience of becoming a new mom. Eric (my husband) and I are expecting our first child coming in April, 2015. It’s a boy!

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My resting boys. I am already out-numbered, why not bring another boy into our little family?! He’ll fit right in.

So far, pregnancy has been an interesting experience and I have been learning a lot of things about myself. First, I would like to list the things about pregnancy that have been difficult a great learning opportunity for me:

  • Your body changes in ways that you may or may not be prepared for emotionally.
  • You are extremely emotional, period.
  • You might not have the energy to keep up with house cleaning, laundry, and self-image maintenance (shaving, waxing, nails, hair, etc.)

Then I find that I am constantly asking myself so many questions:

  • Am I going to be a good mom?
  • What if we can’t afford everything our baby needs?
  • Will he be healthy?
  • Will he like me?
  • Will I be able to lose all the pregnancy weight?

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Gym Selfie taken last week: 23 weeks pregnant

Though it has been easy to track the hard things and worry, I feel so blessed. I am about to become the one thing that I know is a part of my purpose on this earth: a mom. I can’t wait to learn and grow with Eric and figure out how to be the best parents we can to our new baby boy.

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…how I am tracking my progress. I have been trying to get to the gym at least 4 times a week. My goal is to reach 5 times a week.

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…what I eat almost every morning. 1/2 cup oatmeal, 1/2 cup egg whites, 1 T honey, fresh fruit. It’s like heaven and fuels my body for hours! Thanks to my sister Holly for the idea. 

Right now, I am trying to focus my good and bad energy on being healthy, working out, and counting my blessings. Like this scripture (that happened to be one of my dad’s favorites) says:

Verily I say, men should be anxiously engaged in a good cause, and do many things of their own free will, and bring to pass much righteousness;

For the power is in them, wherein they are agents unto themselves. And inasmuch as men do good they shall in nowise lose their reward.

-Doctrine and Covenants 58:27-28.

Baby boy, I can’t wait to meet you. I will keep doing my best for the both of us.